I like the sample which begins the piece—I keep thinking I should do something fun with it. I like the way you’ve shifted it about a bit, and the way you keep the opening bits fairly minimally constructed.

The little “fog” sound texture is all right, but it doesn’t completely “grab” me. The more electronic texture around 1:15 is a fun contrast, and works well.

I could imagine a really fun video which “cuts against” the horror movie sensibility of this piece, and uses it for a satire.

I like the filtering in at 2:15 of a different take at it. The part before and after 2:30 is very interesting and old-time cinematic.

I really like that bit that begins around 3:50.

This piece really should be refit to about 3:00. I suggest that spacing the effects more closely and using fewer repetitions of the melodic sample would make this piece ‘zing’ a bit more. It’s got a lot of good ideas, but I think it would be better a bit shorter.

You’ve done a great deal with the melody, but you could do more. I’m no wizard of the keyboard, but a second melody as a counterpoint to this melody might be fun. It might could be a break into something very minor and very slow, to heighten your effect.

By 7:00, the piece has lingered on too long. When it’s still going at 7:30, I’m puzzled.

Here you’ve got some great ideas, and some fun effects. You’ve used a lot of imagination to manipulate the sample. But you’ve not edited yourself quite enough, and you’ve let the piece wander on too long.
It’s great that you went with a fairly minimal treatment—but a more minimal length is called for.
Still, this was inventive, and provided lots of good ideas for a different take at exploring that fun sample. When I heard the sample, I thought it was a cool thing to remix—and you’ve proven that to be the case.